Just .........Feeling Lonely!!!!!!

 

I don’t know what has happened today. I am feeling as if I am not getting enough oxygen to breathe. Just feeling miserable. I am lying on my bed; just looking at the ceiling seeing the fan rotating. I turned my eyes to see what the exact time is.  It was around 1.30 am in the morning, n I was still wide awake although I was tired of full days work. “Oh no !!!! Not again, I don’t want to have another sleepless night”, thinking this I closed my eyes to sleep. But it was very difficult for me to close my eyes. Certain memories and thoughts were just killing me inside n I felt as If they were stealing away my sleep. Uhhhhhffff!!!!! I don’t want to recall it.

I got up n went to Kitchen prepared a cup of coffee in the late hour of night. Carrying the coffee mug I went outside my balcony, to observe, what my companion of solitude, the night, have in store for me. It was so calm, so quite. Not a single soul was awake, even the trees seemed to be in deep slumber. I felt so jealous, and asked myself, why I can’t be so lucky…..

It seemed to me as if the night was trying to speak something, but what….???Was it sympathizing my condition?  I looked at the roads…. it was also lonely n tired … just like me. It seemed to be waiting for the dawn to break, which would bring an end to its loneliness. I wished I could just walk down those lonely roads, and just walk, trying to figure out what life wanted from me…

I looked up to sky; I felt as if the moon was laughing at me through the clouds. But why? Was it criticizing me…, but it was also alone in the vast sky, there were no stars to accompany it. May be it knew that someday they will be twinkling with it, but maybe I would be left alone, like always...

With my last sip of coffee being finished, I brought back myself to reality, from the web of my unending mysterious thoughts. I went back to my bed to sleep, waiting for the sun to rise and to bring an end to my loneliness.